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  Exclusive Conchords Q & A

To start with the questions lots of people (ie; more than 1) asked
(including Deirdre). Or asked along similar lines....

Any plans on the horizon for touring? If so, where and when?

We have a tentative record deal with an American record label, when (if?) the album comes out we will tour to promote it.

Any new CD or maybe a DVD on its way?

The CD won't be for a while as we are working on a few other things at the moment, conchords related and conchords unrelated. The plan is to have it recorded and released in 2006. There aren't any plans for a DVD yet.

Now the individual questions -

EvilMoose asks:
What was the worst gig you've ever played?

We did a Christmas party for a local cricket club. They really didn't get it. It ended with Bret trying to play 'The Gambler' at the audience's request while Jemaine hurriedly tried to pack up our gear so we could make a quick getaway.

and this one is for the girls... Will either one of you marry me so I can get the heck out of this godforsaken country?

We do.

Spammy asks:
Any chance of FotC making it to the Melbourne comedy festival next year?

Maybe not for the comedy festival, but we might go there for some other gigs.

Why did you fellas tap the mic stands with your feet after singing
'Frodo' at the Melbourne comedy Gala in 2003?

We were being kind of like 'The Who' by trashing the equpiment after the gig. We were just doing it very subtly.

Ellen asks:
either or both of them:
What is the most interesting place you have ever been to, and where is the one place you would really like to visit but haven't yet?

J: I went to Osaka in Japan for about 20 hours on the way to London once. It was like a real-life sci-fi set. I'd love to see Japan properly. I know that technically the answer to that question is wrong but if I could choose to go to a place just to visit it would be Japan.

Kiwis are renowned for inventing interesting sports and games. Have you ever gone Zorbing or is that a touristy thing?

Most people zorb to work. So annoying at rush hour. Especially since you can only zorb downhill getting back home is troublesome.

How do you decide which of you is going to sing a particular song when you're collaborating?

J: Well sometimes a character in a song seems to suit one person better. For instance in the song 'Jenny' which is a duet, Bret plays the character of Jenny because he makes a better woman than I do. In a song like Busdriver, I think we both practised singing the main vocal 'Tony' but we just settled on Bret doing it by the time we first performed it in public.

Dick Grogan asks:
Where do you guys envision yourselves in several years? I guess you
could add best/worst/mediocre case scenarios if you want.

J: I will be a cyborg writing ads for car yards for a small town radio station. Hopefully.

narf FOTC asks:
We know that Flight of the Conchords is only one of many projects you guys are involved in. Have you ever had a conflict managing priorities among The Black Seeds, Humourbeasts, FOTC and whatever else? How do you work out the various schedules and set priorities?

Ocassionally we miss out on a good gig because one of us is been busy doing one of his other things but there are always other gigs. Having other projects really helps give our brains a break from doing the same thing all the time and it's also good to work with other people.

Courtney Ann N asks:
When will my friends and I be able to sport the newest Flight of the Conchords' t-shirt, sweatshirt, bumper sticker etc?

We're not so hot on the merchandising. We have literally made one (no joke) literally one FotC t-shirt. It fits Bret, but not Jemaine.

Andria asks:
How do you stay grounded in your profession? Especially with all the crazy stuff that usually accompanies the work. (Like arrows in shoulders, etc.)

Well a lot of the worst stuff that happens to us (arrows in shoulders, etc.) is actually fictional, so it's not so bad. Also we're not famous, so that helps us keep us pretty grounded. In New Zealand if someone at a party asks you what you do, and you say 'a comedian' they will probably just walk away. Comedians aren't really respected here at all. That keeps us pretty humble.

How would you describe your experience in FotC thus far?

Incredibly varied.

How would you describe your fan base (and be honest, we can take it!)

J: Insane

kneedragger asks:
The only thing I can think of right now is to ask if there is someplace they go to in NZ to play or whatever, so maybe my son can see them if he gets to go to NZ next Summer.

We sometimes play at a bar in Wellington called Indigo on their comedy night (Thursday). We will be playing a few gigs in Wellington at a venue yet to be confirmed at a time also yet to be confirmed.

indigo_jones asks:

Petrov, Yelyena and Me" and "Nothing Wrong" are beautifully twisted songs.
Who had the original idea for the songs and where did you get the inspiration for them?

J: Bret wrote 'Nothing Wrong' while he was acting in a stage version of 'Caberet. Yeah, I can't believe he did that either. I think some of his fellow cast members helped out with it. All I'm saying is don't blame me for that one.

Petrov came from us 'jamming' a waltz tune and thinking it sounded a bit like a russian sea-shanty (not that we really knew what that would sound like).
Both of those songs were written at a time when all of our songs were quite morbid and dark.

When you're performing live, do you try to make each other laugh with certain ad libs?

J: Sometimes. If we're bored.

djdeathskiss asks:
Hey guys! I am planning a trip to New Zealand next year. Can you recommend any good Wellington bars or clubs to visit? I'll make sure to tell them who sent me.

J: It really depends what you like. I recommend Bar Bodega for live music, Havana for a little place to hang out and The Matterhorn to lounge around and be trendy.
There is a strip called 'Courtenay Place' if you like being surrounded but drunk people trying to 'score' each other.

Gayle asks:
How much of the actual HBO show do we see (how much was edited)?

They edited a few minutes out. After we finshed our set we came back on and did a few more songs for them to use in the special if they wanted to.
They chose to show the first set pretty much as it was. They cut a little out of the song 'Jenny' but I think they did a good job,
no one ever notices and that song is probably a bit too long anyway.

Was it an experience worth repeating?

J: Yes, it'd be great to do another one.

A bloke asks:
If you became ridiculously wealthy and famous (or indeed, more so than you already are..), would you continue to live in Wellington? If so, why? If not, where would you live, and why?

J: I love Wellington. I don't really want to move from here. I should point out that we're not famous. Particularly in New Zealand. We're not wealthy either. Except in New Zealand. (Our currency isn't the strongest)

Jennifer C asks:
How often do you perform the songs from the "Folk the World" album?
Do you still play them pretty regularly, or have they mostly been phased out?

J: We haven't played many of them in a long time. We still play 'Albi' and we have been playing 'Bowie's in Space' again lately.

About the song "Albi": the only versions of the song that I've heard begin telling the story with "Part 6." Are there five more parts to the song, and if so, where could we find them?

J: We wrote part six intending that to be the only episode. We did however do a Christmas gig at our local club where we performed 'Albi's very racist Christmas'.

Amaria asks:
If you guys ever got lost at sea, who would be more likely to pull a Petrov?

J: I like to think that neither of us would eat the other in that particular situation.
If it arises though, the survivor will be sure to email you the answer.

What aspect of New Zealand do you miss most when you're away conquering the rest of the world?

J: My friends. Clean air.

/me asks:
Do you have plans to include Mother *uckers on any future album?

J: If we recorded it people might not know that we were censoring the swear words ourselves. If we do another TV special we may do it on that.

What's the scoop on the NBC show?

They passed on our pilot. We currently have a deal with another American network and are in the process of writing another pilot for them at the moment.

Circumstances permitting, would you consider touring with a full backing band?

We might tour with the New Zealand Symphony Orchestra, which is actually just a guy called 'Nigel'.

Rob asks:
I was impressed how in the HBO show, you guys were able to tackle such hard-hitting issues as AIDS, racism, touching monkeys and our children's children getting smaller. I was wondering what other issues you guys feel compelled to write songs about and take a stand for. You could probably do a whole album of monkey touching.

Thanks Rob, look out for our new album 'Monkey-Touching'
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